No, this is not another motivational quote.
Not that there is anything wrong with motivational quotes. We need motivation daily.
This is a lot more than a motivational message.
This is a formula for success (keep reading below)
In life, we all go through undesirable events and experiences. What happens to us, happens to everyone. And yes, some people have more than their share of adversity.
Personally, I have gone through a lot of pain myself.
Pain of confusion, pain of frustration, pain of despair.
Here are some of the events I experienced in my younger days.
- being kicked out of school (suffered from attention deficit preventing me from being able to study)
- raised in a home with a family member with severe bi-polar disorder causing them to engage in highly aggressive behaviors regularly
- growing up with anxiety and low self-esteem, because of the highly volatile and unpredictable home environment
- coming home to find that my girlfriend at the time absconded with my possessions (I never found out where she went)
- I contemplated suicide (got talked out of it by a Telstra life line consultant)
- losing jobs (yes, more than once)
- being beaten up by my friends who I lived with (they were high on drugs and didn't mean to, but smashing a barbell on someone's head is not exactly a minor mistake)
Here is where I am today:
- I am happily married to a woman who still loves me after years of being married (10 years in December this year)
- I love what I do and my occupation is completely aligned to my purpose, passion, strengths and values
- I am healthy and fit
- I run 2 successful businesses and building a third one
- I have finished 6 formal qualifications including a masters degree, currently completing my doctorate degree
- I have written and published two best-selling books with a third one on the way
- I am a radio host for two radio shows
- I speak internationally
- I coach and mentor amazing people (which I find very intrinsically rewarding)
- I am an award-winning wealth advisor
- I am spear-heading this revolutionary movement which is all about helping men become amazing humans and leaders
- I have peace of mind and I am happy and grateful for the presence of God
- I am financially secure
- I have support from many people who know me, like me and trust me
- I am self-assured and confident about who I am
- I have been featured alongside the top financial minds in prominent media
- I have been endorsed by some of the best people in the personal growth industry
I am not sharing any of the above for the sake of highlight my achievements. I also don't share my past to pull on people's heart strings.
In fact I have never been comfortable sharing my past (even though I was told to do so by many marketing experts).
Partly, I was embarrassed by my past and partly I didn't want to come across as another typical 'rags to riches - look at me' type story, getting people to feel sympathetic towards me so I could sell them something.
I simply share the above to highlight my transformation and to share the below formula, which helped me tremendously.
This is what I learnt (from one of my mentors) :
E + R = O
Event + Response = Outcomes
You see, it is not what happens to us that determines our life outcomes. What happens to us, happens to everyone (in one form or another).
It is WHAT WE DO with what happens to us, that determines our life outcomes.
We can't choose the events that happen in our lives. But we can ALWAYS pick our response to these events.
I am not taking away from the fact that some of you may have experienced a lot of pain and challenges in life.
But here is the thing.
In the long run, it will ALWAYS be your response to the event (and not the event itself) that will determine your DESTINY.
Let me assure you of this.
I would love to know your thoughts and your personal stories.
Please don't hesitate to share.
To your success!
- Ron Malhotra